I have a confession. I admit that I’ve been using dating apps since I’ve been single back in 2013. Six years in a relationship from my first ex-boyfriend. We were both young but in the long run, I quit the relationship.
Started using dating apps in 2014 and met a nice guy in one of the dating apps. Now married with a kid and never heard of him again.
Also in that certain app, I met a guy who invited me to Palawan. It was during after my surgery that I need to recover. I was careful of my health and I was thankful for that trip I was able to unwind.
There’s also another dating app that I’ve used for a long time and this one, it’s easy to meet people while traveling because of its location. You can easily meet when you are just one mile away.
Perhaps, you need to be careful in using dating apps and it all depends on your intentions and expectations. Are you looking for travel buddies? The love of your life? Or looking for both?
How To Use Dating Apps While Traveling?
Using dating apps can have both positive and negative effects. But I will share with you some positive use of dating apps while traveling.
1. Enhancing your language skills
Met a Japanese guy as he was learning English in Cebu so we met up and have conversations in English. Same time, we were talking about my experience in Japan so it was easy to have something to talk to while you eat ramen and sushi in a Japanese restaurant. Also, I introduced him to some Filipino cuisines in a Filipino restaurant. Meeting someone for language exchange and the food is the best topic to start a conversation with.
2. Meeting the locals in the area
While meeting the locals in the area is also great for enhancing your language skills, who knows, you can meet a local to show you around and vice versa. You can tell your match that you are just new in the area and you would like to visit some cool or off-the-beaten-path locations.
In Taiwan, I’ve met a guy who was younger than me and showed me some places I’ve never been to. We used a bike rental in Taipei to get around. The next meet-up, we went around on his scooter to visit some temples.
On the other hand, I was able to show someone some places where I lived like some quick things to do in Cebu City.
3. Interacting with people with a common interest
Having some common interest is the best way to start talking on a dating app. How to spot some common interest? First, check out their profile photos. Second, read their biography especially on what’s their expectation of meeting someone on a dating app.
In my profile, I posted a photo of me doing scuba diving. That time, I wasn’t certified for scuba diving. The person I matched with is also into scuba diving. We started the conversation from there and he encouraged me to do the certification. After my open water certification, I was able to witness the thresher sharks.
4. The possibility of meeting your love abroad
Meeting your love abroad or while traveling is pure luck. I have my share of failures actually while using the dating app.
Well, I met someone in the place I am currently living in. I showed him around and it was his last two days on my island. While he already left to another island, he kept on sending me messages and asked me if I was interested to visit other islands with him. I was hesitant. He was even interested to see me again maybe in another country I’ve never been to.
I followed him on a Visayas backpacking trip although I’ve been to those islands already which he had to visit for the first time. We also did scuba diving in Leyte, Bohol, and Cebu while visiting Siquijor and Dumaguete in between.
Although I’ve seen so many red flags, in the middle of the journey, we split. We separated. He hurt me. Too much drama. I traveled solo in Hpa-an, Mawlamyine and back to Yangon.
After Myanmar, I flew to Bangkok and stayed there for two weeks. Went to Phuket for only four days with a friend I met in the hostel as we were excited to see the beach.
The unexpected turn of event
Since it was just a short trip for us, why not use a dating app? So I met this guy and he was fine. We started exchanging messages on a messaging app. Later on, I found out his nationality, the same as the previous guy. I said to myself and to my friend, please never again.
We managed to meet and I introduced him to my friends in a disco club in Patong. We just enjoyed the night dancing until morning. Later on, he needed to leave as he was sleepy already which was fine.
While my friend and I went to some island tours, he invited me again to visit some around Phuket. He told me that he planned on a getaway to Phiphi island for three days. I told him I had to leave Phuket, it was nice meeting him and I go back to Bangkok.
The day of the James Bond island tour with my friend was also the day of his journey to Phiphi island which I believed we would never see each other again. My phone had no internet data and the next day was a flight to Bangkok.
Arrived outside of the hostel very exhausted while my friend and I were talking. I was shocked when he just appeared in front of me and said, “Surprise!”
Couldn’t help but we hugged each other tightly as that would be my last night in Phuket.
He told me why he returned from Phiphi and he sent several messages all day but I was unresponsive. He waited for me, he asked the receptionist if I was still around in the hostel or already checked-out.
Sorry, this is quite a long story but…
He proposed to me if I could stay longer in Phuket and have a getaway together on Phiphi island. Telling me it would be his advance birthday gift to me before I turn 30. I was hesitant because everything was set to go back to Bangkok for volunteer work in a hostel. He convinced me to make amendments to my plan as he wants me to get to know better. My four days in Phuket got extended to 11 days.
Ultimate Reason to Delete All Dating Apps Before I Turned 30
During the days we spent our time together, he was very clear of his intentions for me. Telling me it was love at first. Sounds too good to be true, eh? That time, I was in a state of denial telling him it was too early to say that. I just got out of a vague relationship a month ago and it would be unfair for him if I jumped into another not-so-sure relationship.
He asked me again about my age since it would be my birthday in the next several days. What are my plans in the future?
While he was talking about our possible future, I was in fear and I had no idea what to say. The bad memory from the previous guy kept on haunting me. What if it will happen the same again?
I told him we should take things slow because I don’t want to be disappointed and have another heartbreak in just a short span of time.
Few days before I had to leave Phuket to Bangkok and do a border crossing to Cambodia, I asked him if we should delete all dating apps. I permanently deleted my account on dating apps.
And the ultimate reason to delete all dating apps?
I met someone. And that’s him.
Reflection on the ultimate reason to delete all dating apps
I’m giving myself a chance and meeting him would be my last straw. Telling myself that if this won’t work, it’s not really meant to be. That dating app really sucks and better to have a break with online dating.
To be honest, it felt so good when I was able to delete all dating apps. I was excited to turn 30 those next few days and see what’s going to happen next. Optimistic that starting a year older in a clean slate. Accepting everything that if we fail, I wouldn’t use dating apps as I need a real break.
To be continued?
Right now, it’s better to have a low-key relationship as a long distance relationship is not easy.
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Roxanne is an aspiring digital nomad. A virtual assistant since October 2009. She is a hobbyist blogger, photographer and travels a lot.